Welcome to Our Pad

This weekend was spent on home improvement. I’ve now replaced all of my brass and wheat-themed light fixtures with modern halogen ones from IKEA. (With the exception of the bathrooms – IKEA did not have a large enough light, so I had to go with a silver Fleet Farm model.)
Many of you recall my elation when I finally got the pizza-parlor style ceiling fan in my bedroom replaced. This monstrosity had fake brown wood stickers, painted with a gold wheat design, and an open bowl-like lampshade that trapped dust and bugs for all to view. Since it was directly over my bed, any attempt to clean it usually resulted in dust and bugs falling onto the comforter, and a subsequent trip to “Launder On In” to wash the comforter. (Launder On In recently targeted in a meth-induced crime spree in Farmington.) I no longer look up and think I’m in Carbone’s when I wake up in the morning. Now I have a slick brushed steel and halogen model to blow the air around my room.
Soon I plan to replace my ailing dishwasher and the scuffed vinyl flooring in the kitchen. Perro is so excited about the home improvements, because he rides along to Menard’s and Fleet Farm. Whenever a new visitor arrives, he says, “Woof! Welcome to our pad.”