Farmington Dew Days 2009

Farmington Dew Days is back. A while ago my favorite city festival was renamed to Rambling River Days and the logo was changed to a group of restroom sign people holding hands. You know the generic man and woman that decorate restroom doors - they were prominently featured in last year's logo. Even the gender-neutral wheelchair person got in on the logo action. This year the Farmington festival is returning to its roots, hearkening back to the time when Farmington consumed the most Mountain Dew per capita of any town on earth.

Although the Kiss the Pig audience last weekend was mainly comprised of a motley group of senior citizens, little Miss Farmington contestants and roadies for the cover band Touched, I hold great hope this weekends events will sport better attendance. I'm looking forward to the motocross competition Friday night and the carnival and outdoor movie "Twilight" on Saturday. I hope to see you there!

Rambling River Days Wrap-Up

If you missed the Hairball show at Rambling River Days in Farmington, you missed one of Southern Minnesota's top rock events of 2008. Over 1,500 people crowded around the stage at the Schmitz-Maki arena. Keg after keg of 3.2 beer was drained as Farmington residents rocked out to the sounds of Guns'n'Roses, Metallica and Twisted Sister. The June night air was sweet with the scent of cut grass. A canopy of stars sparkled above the beer tent. Hairball's singer belted out the lyrics to Guns'n'Roses' "Welcome to the Jungle." "You know where you are Farmington? You're in the jungle baby!" A wave of cheers erupted from the crowd. The night was beautiful.

Kiss the Pig

I'm just back from the Kiss the Pig contest at Rambling River Days. I needed to grab a bite of vegetarian food before the big Hairball concert tonight. I need vegetable fuel before I spend two or three hours rocking out.
I won't reveal the winner of the Kiss the Pig contest. If you missed it, you'll just have to wait in suspense until you get this week's edition of the Farmington Independent. Suffice it to say, this year the pig weighed more than me, had to be wrestled to the stage by a police officer and then got kissed by three unnamed Farmington residents. Over $1200 was raised for the senior center as people voted by donations for the Kiss the Pig winner. The real winner this year is the Rambling River Center, which serves the burgeoning Farmington senior community.
Stay tuned for more updates on the Hairball show and maybe, just maybe, a couple of pics of the action.

Mark Your Calendars

As you are planning summer vacations and camping trips, make sure you mark your calendar for Saturday, June 21, 2008. Why? That night you are going to be rocking out to the sound of Hairball with me and thousands of cool Farmington residents at the Schmitz-Maki arena. The arena is just minutes south of beautiful downtown Farmington (literally minutes, even if you are on foot.) Hairball plays the greatest hits of '80's hair metal. That's enough for me to be a fan. But wait, there's more! They do it in costume. They literally transform themselves into living likenesses of Guns'N'Roses, Twisted Sister and AC/DC. Sometimes they switch up the lyrics to humorous subject matter, just like Weird Al. They are Minnesota's best hair metal parody band, and they're coming to Farmington! The excitement in the air is palpable. People are pulling their fringed leather jackets out of the attic and investing in hairspray. I even bought a can, just in case there's a run on hairspray at Econofoods the day of the show. This will be THE concert of the year in Farmington.

Here are the rocking details - be there, or be lame!


Where: Rambling River Days, Schmitz-Maki Arena

When: Saturday, June 21st, 2008 8 PM - Midnight
Get there early for the Kiss-the-Pig contest at 5:30 PM. There's a $5 cover charge after 6. Don't forget to wear your Rambling River Days button! I know it's hard to pin a button onto a leather jacket, so I'm planning to pin mine to my acid-washed jeans.


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Rambling River Days Aftermath

The Kiss the Pig contest was rained out on Saturday night, as a frightening storm blew through Farmington. Trees were uprooted. For the whole story, you can read my July 6 column in the Farmington Independent.
Fortunately Sunday dawned bright and warm, so the Kiss the Pig contest was rescheduled to follow the grand parade. I picked up my grandma and we stopped by the Rambling River Senior Center for a cup of coffee before the parade. I set up a lawn chair on Oak Street for Grandma and plopped down on my picnic blanket on the curb. The Farmington Police started off the parade, with a shiny blue and white cruiser at the head of line. The Dakota County 2-Cylinder club drove their tractors in the parade (as pictured to the left.) The KQ van was on hand, but sadly, none of the morning show guys were on board. The KQ promotional staff was handing out can coolers, but I already have the two that Mike Gelfand gave me.
People were throwing candy off of most of the floats. I scooped up some hard candy for my grandma. What is it with seniors and hard candy? All of the seniors I know keep a stash in their purse and another one in a decorative little candy dish on the coffee table. My grandma just goes nuts for the stuff, especially the mint and butterscotch flavors. I like it once in a while, but I don't really go out of my way for hard candy, even when it's being thrown at me by the Dakota County Dairy Princess.
The Kiss the Pig contest was fabulous. Although there was a little bit of a concern that the pig might not make it to the bandshell on time due to the schedule changes, the contest was still a success. A Farmington police officer won the honors this year, beating out last year's champion, one of teachers at Farmington High. Grandma liked the band, Standing Room Only, that played before and after the contest better than the actual contest itself. Standing Room Only knows a wide variety of hits my grandma appreciates, including Elvis' "Jailhouse Rock" and Jimmy Buffet's "Wasting Away in Margaritaville". Wasting away in Farmington just doesn't have the same ring to it, otherwise I'd write my own tune about the time my neighbors' held Busch Light Draft keg party.
Despite the threat and fear of the storm, the sun shone down on Rambling River Days and made it a rousing success this year. This festival is truly one of the best parts of living in Farmington.

The KQRS Van

Check out the guy in a kilt in the lower left corner of the photo. He's restraining a small child who was about to dash out into the street in front of the van to pick up a stray piece of hard candy. A tragedy was averted.

Rambling River Days

I'm pretty excited. Tonight is the "Midsommar" Fest at IKEA. I'm going to see some native Swedish dancing and check out the giant garage sale in the parking garage. Traditionally Swedes wear floral wreaths to celebrate "Midsommar", so tonight I'm making a floral wreath for Perro to wear around his collar. I'm not going to tell him that traditionally Swedish women wear these wreaths. I don't want him to get all macho and refuse to wear it.
I considered making floral wreaths for the cats, since they're girls, but they've been really cranky with me lately. I'm using a British product called the "Cat Mate" that distributes their food at timed intervals during the day. They're beating up the Cat Mate. They keep kicking it across the laundry room and tearing the little bowls out of the base unit. However, using the Cat Mate to distribute small amounts of food is helping Beaner finally recover from bulemia. She no longer binges at the bowl and then purges on the carpet. Preventing her binges is really important to me. She just doesn't understand that I'm trying to help her help herself. She's always been so independent. I guess she's a typical cat.

"Midsommar" fest is not the only agenda item on my Franklin Planner pages for this weekend. This weekend is Rambling River Days in Farmington (formerly Dew Days). For those of you that subscribe to the Farmington Independent, you can skip the rest of this post. If you read yesterday's column, then you've already seen my ramblings about the upcoming festival. If not, read on.
Tomorrow is the Kiss the Pig contest! I look forward to seeing the cute little piglet. Sunday is the Grand Parade. It's really called the "Grand Parade", although grand might be a bit of an overstatement. I was in the parade a few years ago, walking for the Ladies Workout Express, which is now out of business. The owner gave me a gift certificate to the Ugly Mug as a thank-you for representing the workout center in the parade. Of course, I blew it on one of the Ugly Mug's incredible tuna melts. Then I had to go workout to use up the tuna melt energy. This year the KQ van is rolling in the Grand Parade, so I'm glad I'll be on the sidelines. I'm hoping to catch a bumper sticker or get a chance to wave at Mike Gelfand. Gelfand rocks!

Come out and join me at the Rambling River Days!

Rambling River Days Schedule

Dew Days a Success

The Farmington Independent recently declared Rambling River Days a success. The Kiss the Pig contest was wonderful, especially since I had the oppotunity to enjoy a root beer and a jalepano cheese pretzel while watching from the bleachers. I can't belive that only a day before, Farmington was in a state of disaster. The Farmington citizens who helped with the clean-up after the storm deserve a round of applause. Thanks for keeping the best town in the universe looking good!

Roaming Rambling River Days

Despite the state of disaster in Farmington, Rambling River Days was a huge success. Dozens of people turned out for the Kiss the Pig contest tonight. Mayor Soderberg wore denim overalls and a pair of Billy Bob costume teeth, as a spoof on Farmington's redneck image. Although I voted for the Mayor, he did not win the honor of puckering up to the piglet. A high school coach/teacher won instead. As soon as they announced him, I knew he would win. I would have given anything to see one of my high school teachers kiss a pig. I'm sure the high school kids flooded into area businesses to vote.
My Rambling River Day today was wonderful. I ate a delicious cheese stuffed pretzel and perused the Farmington Tiger T-Shirts for sale at the department store downtown, Dueber's. I wandered the Midway of the carnival set up in the vacant lot behind the Farmington Steak House. There was only one really large ride there, a 60-foot tall, bi-armed spinning contraption with two tiny cars rotating on a center axis, called the Sidewinder. As I approached, I caught a glimpse of the peeling paint and rust enveloping the cars, and realized this ride was probably older than me. I knew it was my destiny to ride the scariest ride at the carnival. I handed the colorful carny my tickets (dampened slightly by the leaking air conditioner condenser in the ticket booth and by my own sweat), and I climbed into my car. After a few minutes of being thrown around the metal cage (there was no seat belt on this ride, just a metal bar), I emerged, bruised, yet invigorated by my purposeful brush with bodily injury. Perro watched from the ground and he was very glad I emerged unscathed. I rounded him up and headed home. Now I'm ready to relax with a comedic DVD and a Diet Cherry 7-Up. A perfect end to a wonderful Rambling River Day.

Farmington is a Disaster

From today's Star Tribune:
"Mayor Kevan Soderberg declared a state of disaster in the city this morning during an emergency session of the City Council."

A storm hit around 6:45 this morning, flooding the highway near my house, breaking limbs off of trees and downing power lines all around Farmington. I opened the front door to rescue my summer wreath, and hail flew into the entryway, landing on my newly laid laminate flooring. Luckily, the flooring was undamaged. My flag pole did not fair as well. While I was peering out the window, the flag pole broke, and went flying across the yard. The storm was so terrible, Farmington is now in a state of disaster. Now that the drama of the storm is over, the real question on every Farmington resident's mind is, "Will Rambling River Days go on?" Today was supposed to be the opening of the festivities. I'm hoping that someone will still get to pucker up at tomorrow night's Kiss the Pig contest, but the prospects look grim. I'll post an update soon!

Do the Dew Days

It's almost time for Farmington's biggest annual party, Rambling River Days (formerly know as Dew Days.) Rambling River Days will be extra special this year. There was a sad time last winter, when I was mourning Dew Days, in the belief that the last Dew Days I attended would be the last one ever. The word on the street was that Dew Days was being cancelled. But Farmington residents rallied to the challenge, and resuscitated Dew Days, breathing new life into the festival with a new name. I can't believe this Saturday is the Kiss the Pig Contest finale! I've been looking forward to seeing a Farmington VIP pucker up to a piglet for months. I already cast my vote for Farmington Mayor Kevin Soderberg to kiss the pig. Who knows? Maybe he'll be the winner this Saturday!

Other articles and fun stuff about Rambling River/Dew Days:

• Rambling River Days Event Schedule!
  
• My first mention of Dew Days
  
• The End of Dew Days, an article from the Farmington Independent
  
• Mourning Dew Days, my sad lament

The Official Rambling River Days 2005 Button

Dew Days Morphs into A New Festival

Well, now the word is out that Dew Days might not be canceled after all. I saw this coming. In a place where people are consuming liters upon liters of a highly caffeinated beverage, such as Mountain Dew, I knew they'd get off their bums to save the town festival. Between the Mountain Dew consumption and the amount of coffee drank at Lutheran church functions in Farmington, people are probably hopping from foot to foot constantly. Let's hope that energy translates into a surge of voluntarism for the festival planned in the wake of Dew Days, the newly christened Rambling River Days.

The article in the Farmington Independent says that a volunteer meeting for the new Rambling River Days is scheduled from 7-9 PM in January at the Eagles Club. Unfortunately, the article doesn't give the actual date of the meeting, so I'm worried that the only people who will show up are the regulars who are always at the bar in the Eagles Club from 7-9 PM.

From the name of this new festival, you may have the impression that the Rambling River is an actual river in Farmington. It isn't. The Vermillion River runs through Farmington, or more aptly, dribbles through Farmington. It's more like a wide creek than a river, but a stroll along its banks is beautiful nonetheless. There's nothing better than strolling along the river on a summer day, through the little park in downtown Farmington, and then heading over to Dairy Queen for a Dilly Bar. It's one of Perro's favorite things about Farmington, and one of mine too. So was Dew Days. I hope that the new Rambling River Days can meet the high expectations set by previous Dew Days celebrations. May the Kiss the Pig contest go on!

Mourning Dew Days

Well, it sounds like last summer's Dew Days celebration in Farmington will be the last. I'm glad I went while I had the chance. This year the Battle of the Bands was pretty cool. The bands even had a real stage to play on since Farmington borrowed a stage from the Lakeville Parks'n'Rec department. One of the bands came all the way from Rosemount. The winning band played the Dakota County Fair. Unfortunately, I did not get to see that show since they played at 4 PM on Thursday afternoon.



Since the Battle of the bands was outside, I brought Perro along. Perro loved the Battle of the Bands. He was rocking out! Someone brought along an iguana to see the show, and when Perro spotted the iguana, he stood up and sniffed the air. I know he recognized it was one of Whippy's brethren. He's a smart little guy.



Dew Days is one of the best parts of living in Farmington. I'll always cherish the memories of my Dew Days experiences. Ah, the memories, sitting in the beer garden with my neighbors, riding the Tilt-a-Whirl at the tiny carnival on the vacant lot downtown, and watching the winner kiss the piglet at the Kiss-the-Pig contest. I'll mourn the passing of Dew Days.



An Article on the End of Dew Days, From the Farmington Independent

Am I a Nerd or a Person in Another Culture Altogether?

"Developers are least qualified to validate a business requirement. They're either nerds and don't get it, or they're people in another culture altogether." - John Michelsen, chief executive of iTKO Inc., a software testing company.



I found this great quote about computer programmers in a CNN on-line article. I almost fell off of my ergonomic chair laughing. So, according to Mr. Michelsen, I'm either a nerd or a person in another culture. I'm pretty sure I fall into the latter category, considering the unique culture of Farmington, including lawn tractor racing, meat raffles and $2.35 steak lunches.

I've tried to introduce other people to the unique cultural activities of Farmington. I've brought a few people (okay, dragged a few people along) to Dew Days, our town festival. (Back in 1982, Pepsi Co. gave Farmington some money for a town festival because we had the highest per capita consumption of Mountain Dew in the world.) This year I brought a friend to the Dew Days "Kiss the Pig" contest. The town's waste management supervisor won. He had to wear a paper crown and had to kiss the cutest little pink piglet in front of a huge group of Farmington residents. Although I detect an air of condescension in Mr. Michelsen's comment, I'm not embarrassed to be in a different culture altogether, particularly since the alternative is being a nerd. So, bottoms up, it's time for another Mountain Dew.